Mar 23, 2009

To be completely immersed AKA obsessed with a subject... say, to have put in the all-nighters and strains on relationships and headaches and library fines and assignments to be acknowledged as, say, the world's most notable Proust scholar... that's something I'm a little ambivalent about. It's something I'm wary about.
But are we driven by dissatisfaction? Are we or aren't we?
Maybe not wholly, but anyway... I think this happens to a larger degree when I meet new people and give them the basic data about my being (Junior at Dordt, majoring in English Writing, on Student Gov't workstudy, take electives in video and photography, interested in food - both creation and consumption, born in Michigan, living in Iowa etc.) But I always wonder how those initial pieces of information will affect their mental synopses of me. What do I subscribe to? What do I take notes on? What music do I listen to? What are my favorite books and movies? What was the best part of my Spring Break?
The challenge of trying to be a(n) artist, writer, photographer, cook, scholar is that I want to be completely immersed... in all those things. Shit. Yes, yes - being good at one makes me better at the other, I got it.
Anyway, dear friends... here's to the exalted bliss of the journey, and the submission in its closing, to open beds upon our arrival back, to our desks that are just as haphazard as the way we left them, to the vulnerability that our loved ones have on us, to cold vodka and spiced rum that will be legal in a little more than a month, to conviction, motivation and steadfast prayers to battle the tough days, to the things we won't say and to open days, in which to do as we will.

7 comments:

  1. Katy JoyMarch 24, 2009 at 7:46 PM

    alvin. come to alberta with your brother this summer, okay? I heard he is coming in august. stay with my family. we need to spend some time together. what has it been? 2 years?

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